Pearl

A female, a mother-to-be, independent, compassionate, protective, devoted.

When I first met Pearl, I was in a place of emotional transition. I was traveling on my own to reset and recharge.  During this time, I was unsure of who I was, where I was, and which direction I wanted to go next personally and professionally.

Pearl startled me when I first saw her, and in that moment, I panicked. The thoughts started to make their way in – thoughts that I was being selfish for taking time away on my own to rediscover myself and reset – time away from my husband, my dog, my parents, and my daily responsibilities.  I called my husband and texted a friend, only to discover I was right where I needed to be.  Breathe….

Pearl returned two days later, only this time she was busy. She didn’t notice I was there watching her methodically take care of her home, her nest. She was preparing for the arrival of her family. Pearl isn’t any different than any other mother-to-be that I’ve met other than the fact that she has wings. Pearl is a wasp.

Our story continues as I became conflicted with the human need to inform the owners of the property I was staying at about Pearl’s presence. I knew that if I informed them, an action would be taken.  As a small business owner myself, I wanted to support the female business owners of the property, as this would be something they needed to know for the safety of their future guests.   

Pearl reappeared later that night, only this time she was confused, searching for the nest she had so methodically built one piece at a time. It’s as if I could hear her questioning and feel her loss. I kept the windows opened and left her to question and mourn. 

The next morning when I awoke, Pearl was in the bedroom window with me. She appeared to have spent the night. In that moment I felt connected to Pearl in a familiar way. One where the divine feminine comes together with love and compassion, supporting one another. Knowing she wouldn’t live long, I gently helped her to the window so she could find food and be free. 

As I packed up my room, I reflected on the past few days. I noted how my time there started in a panic, and ended in a state of calm. After packing up my car, I returned to the room one more time. In that last moment, I saw Pearl in the window where her nest once was. It’s as if she was petting the window in mourning the way a mother might pound her fist on a wall or the floor in sorrow. I cried. I cried for her loss.  I cried for the loss that I created for her.

Then I transitioned. I healed, drawing on my Reiki healing to send love and peace to Pearl. I reflected on how the divine feminine takes all shapes, forms, sizes, and beings. I acknowledged that as a divine feminine we have the opportunity to love greatly, to care for the planet and each other, to show compassion, and to connect.

As a wise friend once shared with me, wasps & hornets are generally about empowerment, breakthroughs, and abundance. It seems fitting that Pearl would introduce herself when I needed her the most.

Animals and insects play a significant role in our lives.  They are with us daily and often times present themselves to give us information. They enable us to take a pause and explore what’s happening in our lives, and discover where we want to go.  Some might be part of our lives always, others may pop-in, like Pearl, to give us a distinct message or opportunity to reflect.

What animals and insects are present in your life? Here are four things to consider in discovering an animal totem. 

• Do you have a favorite animal or insect since you were young? 

• Do you have tattoos?  What animals or insects are frequently coming up?

• Do you collect items with a particular animal or insect on them?

• Which animals or insects have presented themselves to you most recently?

If you want to explore your animal totems at a deeper level contact me for a virtual tea conversation.